I’m Bob Wendover. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone. Boy, I wish I had said that! That sentiment comes from writer Neal Donald Walsch, the author of Conversations with God.
Allow me to ask you a troubling question. How many opportunities have you squandered over your lifetime because you didn’t step outside of your comfort zone? I am using the word “squandered” purposely here because in a strict sense, that’s what they are. I’m not just talking about the big opportunities like applying for a stretch job or accepting an invitation to do something that scared you, like skydiving? I’m talking about that cute gal or guy you didn’t approach in your teens or maybe the price you paid for something because you were afraid to ask for a better deal.
We all face these situations. Like you, my squandered opportunities probably number in the thousands. I don’t say this to depress you, but to point out that refusing to step outside of your comfort zone adds to your stress in the workplace and the rest of your life. Why? But squandered opportunities turn into laments, as in “If only . . .” and worries, as in “What must people think, since I didn’t grasp that chance? Maybe they think I’m a chicken,” and other debilitating thoughts.
One of the characteristics about the top business performers I have interviewed and observed, is that they ask themselves three questions all the time when opportunities arise – What are the chances? What’s the worst that could happen? And What’s the best that could happen? Now, that doesn’t mean they ask these questions out loud, although that’s been known to happen. It’s just a part of their wiring. As a result, they are better prepared and ready to act in the moment, rather than listen to the voice that urges fear and hesitation. The more this has become ingrained as a habit, the more often their efforts have been met with success. This is not magic. It’s mindset.
So what can you do to feel more comfortable stepping outside your comfort zone? Here are three quick steps?
First, ask the three questions I just mentioned. Risks, large and small, require consideration before taking action. Too often, we act impulsively. As a result, we are not prepared to move confidently when the opportunity presents itself. When entering into unfamiliar situations, the best thinkers attempt to anticipate how to leverage these opportunities by developing an approach they hope will move the process forward.
I, for instance, am asked to speak at lots of conferences each year. Because of this, I am invited to endless receptions. For a long while, I let my introverted nature, dissuade me from engaging at these gatherings, no doubt foregoing numerous opportunities to make important connections. Finally, I asked myself these three questions in the context of what I could do to leverage these invitations. As a result, I came up with a half dozen questions and conversation openers. Now, these receptions are not only rewarding, but even fun. What’s a part of your “discomfort zone” where you can apply this strategy?
Second, recall your past successes. Let’s face it. We tend to take our successes for granted and dwell on our failures. What if you reversed that process and dwelled on the successes and took for granted that risking rejection is a part of life. My good friend, Tom Olson, once served as personal assistant to W. Clement Stone, the founder of Aon Insurance and a renowned writer on the principles of success. One of the things Tom shared about that experience was that Stone seemed to possess an attitude that the universe was conspiring to make him a success. With a belief like that, how could he not succeed and inspire those around him to do the same?
Third, maintain your perspective. I can’t count the number of times I stepped outside of my comfort zone and my actions have not met with success. Neither can you. But each of these rejections leaves us with a choice. We can dwell on the failure or learn from it. The latter is always the better option. Want proof? Just ask successful salespeople, athletes and investors. Each of these mishaps provides an opportunity to fine turn our desire and approach for the next time. After all, closing one out of every one hundred prospects can make you rich and maintaining a batting average of .333 will put you in the Hall of Fame.
So, whether you’re thinking of approaching the cute stranger, jumping out of perfectly good airplane, or pursuing your stretch target at work, take the next step. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone and will reduce your sense of overwhelm and burnout.