I’m sure you’ve been in the situation. You are about to have a conversation where the stakes are pretty high. Maybe you need to persuade your boss or your boss’ boss of something. Perhaps you need to confront someone you work with or maybe a vendor who has let you down. Maybe you need to call a customer who is frustrated or angry about the service they have received.
So, you got into the conversation. You thought you were ready. But the words that came out of your mouth weren’t at all what you planned to say. Maybe you fumbled your words. Perhaps the other person came back with a response you had not anticipated. You felt flustered. You began to sweat. You felt like you were failing. You came away from the meeting disappointed. Things went wrong. You missed an opportunity. Maybe you made matters worse. You went home that evening continuing to replay this unfortunate incident in your head. You really thought you were prepared. How did it go so wrong?
The answer? You didn’t rehearse. Rehearsing prior to important or high-stakes meetings or conversations is essential. Why? Because of the tension in your brain between logic and emotion. We all navigate the world with preconceived notions about what will happen when we act. But the world doesn’t know what we’re thinking. So, when they react differently than what we thought, our emotions, primarily fear of the unknown, takes over. As a result, the brain launches the stressor hormones, adrenaline and cortisol and all kinds of thoughts of what could go wrong. These drain your energy, make you feel overwhelmed and make you feel unprepared. And all this can happen in an instant.
How do you deal with it? Rehearse the situation ahead of time. Consider a conversation you need to have in the coming days, something where there might be some discomfort, or you have to persuade your boss, or you’re uncertain of the outcome. Try to anticipate the different ways the other person or people might respond? Formulate responses to these questions or objections? Then rehearse these responses with a friend colleague or partner. When you rehearse out loud in front of others, you will grow in your confidence and be better prepared in the moment.
The best decision makers know to do this and have made it a habit. As a result, they are more adept at navigating the unexpected when, not if, it happens. What do you do to anticipate the unexpected when the outcome is uncertain or the situation is uncomfortable? We’d all like to know. Put them in the comments below and make sure to subscribe to this channel for more practical ideas just like these. I’m Bob Wendover.