As many of you, I took time this year to watch one of 2012’s sleeper hits, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. For those of you who have not seen it, the movie tells the story of a disparate group of elderly Brits who find themselves leaving the United Kingdom for a variety of mostly sad or unpleasant reasons. As luck would have it, they all end up at this dilapidated hotel in Bombay, India.
The characters, each in their own way, have to adapt to the change thrust upon them. As you might imagine, most thrive in their new surroundings. A couple do not. But those who do, discover something about their resilience that they never knew before. I suspect the movie resonated with me and others for a simple reason. It deals with that universal truth that a fulfilled life comes though overcoming the challenges that are thrown at you.
One of the remarkable evolutions that we have observed over the past several decades has been society’s shift toward convenience and ease of living. If you believe today’s marketing, we all deserve everything faster, better, cheaper, 24/7/365 with the touch of a screen. And oh, by the way, no one needs to work for it. Martians landing in the US would get the impression that no one is really supposed to exert themselves because there must be an app for that. But as one learns with experience, the harder and smarter you work, the luckier you seem to get.
Now it’s easier for the older of us to philosophize about how young people don’t understand the value of hard work. In fact, most sentences that begin with the words, “I remember when,” tend to finish with a lament about work ethic, laziness, or some such misguided perception. But these laments don’t address an issue that has distorted the perceptions of emerging generations about how to thrive long term. Yes, many of them had a rude awakening over the past few years because of the economic downturn. But that does not mean they have emerged more resilient as a result. Sadly much of what they might have learned is being contradicted by media messages and public policy that tells them that they deserve without discomfort.
But ask a sample of those Millennials who are thriving, as I do regularly, and you’ll find that they are practicing the values that previous generations were taught as well. They express appreciation for the expectations their parents placed on them, the handful of teachers and others who said or did something that inspired them, and the challenging obstacles they faced whether there was a successful outcome or not.
A while back, my wife and a few of her colleagues were invited to dinner at a wealthy sponsor’s home. To her delight, the two individuals waiting on the dinner party were this couple’s teenage son and daughter. It’s those kinds of stories that warm my heart, but we need many more. We can’t surrender to those endless messages of have it all for nothing or live without consequences. What can you do to help win this battle?